Sleep
by Kei Luna Shoryu
Summary: Jensen wonders if Cougar sleeps. Pooch wants to eat. Clay messes with Jensen. And Cougar just wants information. PWP, possible implied CougJen pairing.


**So, hi. I'm KLS. This is my contribution to an awesome fandom filled with awesomeness, and a thanks goes to my sister for requesting this be made.**

**I have to say I'm looking forward to seeing this fandom grow. Readers can consider this AU/Movie Verse, or some weird combination of both.... Or they could just ignore that and go with the flow anyway. (Those people are my favorites. ;D)**

**Cougar/Jensen may be implied if you so desire. Otherwise, you can view it as him being messed with. Or, as Clay playing match-maker... but really, that's up to you.  
**

**Enjoy. And, y'know, for those who aren't _too _busy. I could use a review. Or five. Or ten. Or something that's over.. oh, I don't know, 9,000, maybe?? Please? o.o?**

**~Ciao!  
**

* * *

"Hey Pooch, can I ask you something?" Pooch looked up from where he was sitting, giving Jensen a wary look.

"Since when do you _ask _if you can ask something?" Jensen gave the other a look before turning back to his computer.

"Does Cougar sleep?"

"What?"

"Y'know…Cougar…sleep…That thing you do when you're lying down at night with your eyes closed and let your subconscious fill your mind with soccer championships and your niece's team rules the world through their awesome domination skills–"

"Yeah, I know what sleeping is, but what the hell kind of question is that?"

"Um… a perfectly legitimate one?" Pooch resisted the urge to roll his eyes and returned to his breakfast, hoping to be able to ignore Jensen…only to have those hopes be crushed rather cruelly like some poor burning ant under some kid's magnifying glass as Jensen sat down across from him, the chair scraping obnoxiously on the wood flooring.

"Watch the chair."

"Right, sorry. So?" Pooch sent his scrambled eggs a last, mournful look before staring at Jensen. They stared at each other for a few minutes before Jensen made an impatient, exasperated motion involving the upper half of his body.

"So, what?"

"Do you think Cougar sleeps?" Jensen asked, his impatience bleeding into his voice.

"Of course he sleeps." Pooch replied, silently wondering why he was even bothering with this. He glanced around the room, empty save the two of them and his plate of food, more of which sat innocently on the stove. An empty plate was on the counter Jensen had been standing next to, which meant the tech had already eaten, and there was a clean dish on the dish rack, signifying Cougar's presence at some point as well. He scowled. No distractions.

"Have you seen him?" Pooch sighed.

"Have I seen him do what?"

"Sleep!" Jensen yelled.

"Keep your voice down."

"Sorry. Sleep," Jensen replied his voice lowered to an almost conspiratorial whisper. Even with the apologetic air around him, Pooch could clearly see Jensen's annoyance. It almost made him smile. He deserved at least some kind of enjoyment out of this conversation; he may as well get it from the one who initiated it. Even so…

"No, Jensen. I haven't seen Cougar sleep." Jensen didn't waste time.

"So then how do you know he sleeps?" Pooch shook his head, taking a bite out of his eggs. It was seven in the morning. Clay and the military had done one hell of a job conditioning them to wake up at certain hours. Trying to get back to sleep only made him paranoid, so he'd learned to embrace the routine. He'd be damned if he was going to lose his breakfast because of some crack-pot Jensen Theory.

"I mean think about it. He's always the last one to bed, so no one really _sees _him go to his room. And he's always up at freaking dark o' clock roaming about. I woke up to get some milk once, and he was there. I don't know what he was doing. Probably lurking. He's good at that. Fucking creepy though –"

"Language."

"–Sorry, and his room's always empty. Empty and spotless – y'know I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't even _know _it was his room –"

"Wait a minute, wait a minute. Jensen, you went into his room?"

"What? Oh yeah, I was trying to catch him asleep, to finally prove it."

"And you didn't get…I don't know… _shot_, or anything?"

"No. It was empty. _See!?_That's my point! He doesn't sleep!" Pooch stared at Jensen, open-mouthed for a few minutes. Long enough for Jensen to smirk and lean back in his chair, arms folded smugly across his chest. Pooch shook his head slowly.

"You lucky moron."

"Aw, you're just jealous because you didn't notice it first. I'll tell you, it wasn't easy. With all the time he spends to himself, it's _really _hard to notice."

"No, you're lucky he wasn't there to _shoot _you. In the head,"

"Who should've been shot in the head?" Clay asked, walking into the room. Jensen turned to answer, but Pooch beat him to it.

"Jensen,"

"For what?"

"Breaking into Cougar's room," Clay sent a dubious look toward the now spluttering Jensen.

"You broke into Cougar's room?" he asked.

"No. _No! _I was merely…experimenting…on a…uh…hypothesis. Yeah! And, it just so happened to involve Cougar, directly. And I needed to find out." Jensen forced out, half-blushing and waving his arms wildly in exasperation. Clay's dubious expression morphed into one of skepticism.

"Uh-huh, I'm sure. And what _was _the verdict, might I ask?" Jensen shrank in his seat slightly, sending Clay a sheepish look as he mumbled out an answer. Clay folded his arms and raised an eyebrow. Jensen coughed.

"Cougar…doesn't…sleep?" Pooch scoffed, turning his full attention to his lukewarm breakfast, apparently satisfied with letting Clay handle the conversation.

"Cougar doesn't sleep." Clay repeated flatly. Jensen nodded. Clay raised thumb and forefinger to bridge of his nose, shaking his head slightly. "Of course he sleeps."

"When!?"

"Haven't you ever seen him lounging about with his hat covering his face?" Jensen thought for a minute, blue eyes glazing over in thought before they snapped back into focus followed by a slightly waspish tone.

"Of course I have!"

"He's sleeping when he does that."

"What, really?"

"What'd you think he was doing? Checking the inside of his hat for dirt-specks or something?"

"Well, yeah, kinda. I mean, I always figured he was just thinking deeply about something. He always seems to know what I was talking about and contribute to the conversations around him." Pooch paused long enough to send Jensen a flat look along with Clay. Jensen rolled his eyes.

"You know what I meant," Silence followed the statement as Pooch finished his breakfast and Clay served himself some, while Jensen sat staring at the table. Then he stiffened, turning irritated blue eyes to Clay.

"That means he sleeps through all of the debriefing stuff you give us!" Clay paused, shrugging with one shoulder before sitting down at the spot Pooch vacated.

"Yeah, I s'pose."

"That's not possible." Clay scoffed, a small smirk forming on his lips as he took a bite out of his eggs.

"And why's that?"

"One, because he always knows where he needs to be, and when he needs to be there, without anyone telling him. Two, because you'd kick his ass." Clay's smirk grew and Jensen felt his ire rise. "You'd better be kicking his ass! The one time, _one time_, I fell asleep at one of those things you almost ate my soul. My _soul_! You're not allowed to play favorites." Clay scoffed.

"You're right. He must not sleep then. I'm stumped." Jensen seethed at the completely flat tone, standing up quickly but carefully, ever-mindful of the floor, before storming out of the house. Pooch watched him go from the counter, turning curious eyes to Clay.

"Do you think he's going to ask Cougar?" Clay shrugged.

"I don't know. Maybe."

"So…_is_ that when Cougar sleeps?"

"Hell no. He's not that stupid."

"So…when _does _he sleep?" Clay shrugged again.

"My guess? On his missions. His head piece is _really _loud." Pooch opened his mouth, but slowly closed it and shook his head as he made his way back to his room and his wife, pausing to make sure the baby was still asleep. There were some things he just shouldn't worry himself with. Like why everyone was at_ his _house, and if Cougar slept. Experience taught him to just accept things as they were…especially when it came to his team.

* * *

"Hey, Cougar!" Cougar's attention shifted immediately, almost too quickly and he twitched as he caught the gun he'd been cleaning. The approaching blonde didn't notice the fumble, which was just as well. Jensen attached onto the strangest of things, one little fumble could turn into the News of the Week. He'd rather avoid that kind of attention.

"I have a quest – what are you doing!?" Cougar paused, unsure if he should answer, before gesturing to the gun in his lap. He'd figured it would be self-explanatory, but then, this _was _Jensen.

"Yeah, okay, you're cleaning a gun. Got that, but _out here_?" Cougar tilted his head to the side slightly, tipping his head toward the house and then motioning to his gun before shaking his head.

"Oh, right, Pooch doesn't want guns in the house. Makes sense, what with Mrs. Pooch and Baby Pooch inside. But, didn't he say you could have like… two?" Cougar nodded slowly. They were in his room, one under his pillow, and one by the lamp beside the bed. Pooch had wanted them locked up, but then there wouldn't have been much point in him having them there in the first place, so they settled on locking the door to his room.

They all had one, after so many off-days where everyone seemed to pool around Pooch's place. It was big enough, and they had enough rooms. Pooch had been trying to kick Jensen out at the time it was suggested. Mrs. Pooch had said they were family and it was fine. That had pretty much settled the matter. Mainly because Jensen was an opportunist and Pooch was whipped.

"Couldn't you…I dunno…do it in the backyard or something though?" What? Oh right, Cougar glanced down at the gun and rag in his hands, and then looked back up at Jensen.

"Right, never mind, forget I said anything. That's not why I came out here." Cougar watched as Jensen took a few deep breaths, finally returning to cleaning his gun as he waited.

"Do you sleep?" Cougar hesitated, checking the sights on his gun as he considered the question, aiming at Jensen. It usually unnerved the tech, and he wanted more information. Jensen had reasons behind his questions, and while most of the time the reasons were flawed 'Jensen Logic,' they were still reasons. Cougar resisted a smirk as Jensen started to ramble. It worked like a charm, every time.

"I mean, because I've never seen you sleep. And, you know, I've watched you for it. Never. Not once. I even went into your room. I know you don't use it. And, wow, that makes me sound kinda creepy, huh? B-but that's not the point! You're always wandering around or something. Or… watching…like…the dark. I dunno, but you do it! Instead of sleeping, and that _so _can't be healthy…"

Cougar lowered his gun, watching with abject fascination as Jensen continued to ramble on. It amazed him, sometimes, how much Jensen could just talk, and talk, and never run out of air or find something to expound on. It was times like this he revealed just how much he paid attention, even when he didn't realize it. It was probably because he was a computer tech. Like Cougar, Jensen specialized in details. At least it explained why the lock to his room was broken… and why he'd felt eyes on him more than usual over the last week or so.

"…And then Clay practically admitted to favoritism, so here I am." Wait, what? Cougar shook his head just slightly, putting his gun out of sight as he walked toward Jensen, the blond visibly tensing with every step.

"I don't sleep."

"What…_do _you do?" Cougar paused, watching Jensen shift minutely every few seconds before reaching behind him to open the door.

"I fall into a trance." He responded, adding that little edge to his voice that on anyone else would make them sound sarcastic. With Cougar, it just sounded like he was straining to answer a question that should have been obvious. Jensen shuffled out of the way as Cougar stepped into the house, but he couldn't just let it go.

"Oh. Well, when do you do that?" Cougar paused, again, glancing back at Jensen in amusement, allowing his lip to curve into the smirk he'd been withholding.

"During debriefing. Or missions." He tipped his hat to Jensen, before walking back inside, letting the door shut behind him. Outside, Jensen stood open mouthed, trying to force sound out but failing miserably. Finally he let out a strangled yell.

* * *

Clay looked up when Cougar entered. There were a few moments of silence before Clay pointed to the empty dish on the counter.

"Mrs. Pooch won't be happy if that's still there when she gets up." Cougar gave Jensen's empty plate a cursory glance.

"I'll take care of it."

"And the broken lock?" Cougar set the dish into the sink, turning his head to look at Clay, idly flipping through the pages in the newspaper.

"I'll take him with me." A small quirk of the lips gave away his amusement.

"Don't stay out too late." Cougar tipped his hat in acknowledgement before cleaning Jensen's dish. Clay was gone when he turned around.


End file.
